Well, I always said this would be a blog about single parenthood, and for the most part, that has been the case. In regards to this post, it is most definitely the case, although it isn't a laughter-laced tale of something completely random that my children did, or the comedies that come along with the dating scene. No, this in reference to a far more serious topic. Money.
In just about any divorce, at least one, or even both parties take a serious financial hit. It is the nature of the beast. The divorce process itself is costly, and the price tag of getting back on one's feet is far from miniscule. Everyone has to learn to adjust, and if there are children involved, some have to adjust more than others. What was once an evening to dine out at your favorite restaurant now becomes a family-sized box of macaroni and cheese with Spongebob Squarepants annoyingly grinning up at you from the box. That yearly vacation you always took? Yeah, you'll be spending that money on school supplies, Halloween costumes, and a new washing machine (after you have clean worn yours out from the 25 loads of laundry you do every week-- by yourself).
Oh, and paying off the debt you have had to accrue as a result of said divorce? Yeah, you can forget about that, too, because the bank will take one look at your income, and laugh at you when you apply for a loan.
Look, I get it. Banks can only assume so much risk. Understandable. However, when they are looking at my financial information, and can see how much I comfortably pay each month on the debts that I have, and it is virtually the same amount as what I would be paying them each month on a loan payment that would eliminate that debt, and they still say no-- that, I don't understand. My goodness, a different bank just loaned me enough money to buy a house. This should not be rocket science.
So, here I am, a single working mom, who has always been smart with her money, trying to make yet another positive financial decision that will help get her recovering family ahead, and "back on their feet" following something none of us ever asked for, and the answer is "no". "Why," you may ask? Income. Not my credit (which I have worked very hard to keep squeaky clean). No, it's the fact that, according to their "magic formula", I don't make enough money.
Oh, but wait! Let's not forget that they have proof right in front of them that I have the money to comfortably make a payment each month. How does this even make sense?
Yes, here I am, a single working mom, attempting to be responsible and pay my dues, and I am being denied the opportunity to do that. How is this right? It is no wonder so many families have had to file for bankrupcy in recent years. The options to pay off debt, and pay it off responsibly, (if you don't make six-figures, anyway), seem to be few and far between. Short of winning the lottery, it is all but impossible to get credit cards paid off, given their current interest rates, which is another gripe entirely. Yes, let's punish the long-standing, loyal, responsible accounts with rising interest rates. That's just awesome.
I go to work every day. I pay my taxes. I obey traffic laws. I am ridiculously nice to people. I pay my bills on time. So yes, I am aggravated that my desire to continue my responsible path in life is being hindered over the fact that I am on a single income. What does the bank want me to do?-- Sell my soul and actually go out with one of these uptight, money-driven corporate guys who ask me out, and then get hitched in six months, just so I can tie another income to my application? Really? Sorry, but that's not going to happen, and yet I feel like I am being punished for making good life choices.
So yes, I am hacked at the system, and this is my brief soapbox moment. Does this mean I am throwing in the towel? Hardly. I mean, really-- when have I ever thrown in the towel?
